When Life Doesn’t Go the Way We Thought

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I am a homeschooling mom. 17 years ago when I was just starting college homeschooling wasn’t an idea that I even knew existed. My plan at 17 was to finish college, go back to Mexico and start my career. Isaiah 55:8-9 fits perfectly for how my life turned out to be 17 years later, I am 34 years old now.

“My plans aren’t your plans, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord. Just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my plans than your plans.” This is so true!

My plans did not include marriage for a while, for sure not until after I graduated from college; I got married my Junior year in college.

My plan located me back in Mexico focused on my carrier, instead I became an American citizen, got married, worked for six months and became pregnant.

My plan had me as a following her own carrier outside of the home mom and sending my kids to school, instead I had my first baby, my family and I moved to Cancun, Mexico for four years as missionaries and by the time my oldest was three I felt a very strong calling to homeschool.

Following God’s plan for my life hasn’t been perfect, mostly because of me. I get in my head a lot, I have a bad attitude, I compare myself and sometimes I think I am not doing much with my life or I lose sight of what is really important.

This world and my flawed need to please people has conditioned me to believe that success only looks a certain way, that contentment comes from people’s approval of my decisions, that status is the goal and that being a stay at home mom is just too little of a thing to strive for.

One thing has remained constant all through I can remember. My parents always taught me with their words and actions to trust God and follow his ways. It was something that was ingrained inside of me. I can’t really explain it, I can just say that I remember all through my life feeling a tug in my heart. Sometimes I would ignore the tug and live the consequences, but I always felt this unexplainable trust in who God was.

I remember in my darkest moments the tug would get stronger and I would look for refuge in him. My parents instilled the fear of the Lord in me, and God always showed me his way. There is peace in his ways.

I look back to these 17 years and I can see him in every moment.

My life has been a life of obedience because I love him. A life of trust because he cares for me.

A life that is about giving him glory is not always easy, sometimes it hurts and I don’t have all the answers, but a life without him would be excruciating.

So, my plans didn’t come to pass the way I thought they would, but his plans are higher. I don’t always understand, but I keep walking and trusting him, he has never failed me.


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