“Those lights are awful. Why do they use lights that enhance things that I want to hide?” These were the thoughts that were going through my mind while trying on a swimming suit. The light made my body insecurity feel very strong.
I needed to go shopping for a swimming suit for our family trip to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico a few months ago. I always dread doing this. Swimming suits are getting smaller and they mostly are made for women that have never had children.
I know I should be thinking of more than just looking good wearing a swim suit. As a mom I need swimming suits that will keep everything in place and covered so I can enjoy my time with my kids without feeling self-conscious or pulling and yanking on things all the time.
I think wearing a shirt and shorts would get the job done, but who wants a farmer’s tan all summer long?
I was ready to give up. After going to four different stores at the mall and just feeling worse after every store, I finally arrived at a store that provided a pleasantly different experience.
I entered the changing room and the first thing I noticed were the lights. They made me look at myself in a different way. The second thing were the mirrors. It wasn’t a magic mirror. Other women that had been there before had left post-it notes with encouraging words. Words that spoke truth about my body and the miracle that it is. This is where I bought my swimming suit. Those words and the light made a big difference. Those two things are what we need to overcome body insecurity.
2 Steps To Overcome Body Insecurity
See yourself in a different light
Our minds eyes are completely flawed. We see beauty through the eyes of this very unstable world. We will never be satisfied with the person in the mirror because standards of beauty are always shifting and changing.
We compare ourselves with other women that also have insecurities about their bodies, so even if we looked like them we would still not feel content. We also compare ourselves with our past selves. You know, the way we used to look before we had babies. No stretch marks, no extra pounds, everything was in it’s place, no gray hair and no dark eye circles. Comparing ourselves with others can also lead to identity problems. You can read about how to find your identity as a mom here.
The truth is that our bodies are beautiful the way they are. We are not supposed to look like our college selves because that was ten years ago (This is for me. It might be less or more for you.) We didn’t have anyone to care for but we also had never felt the kind of love we feel for our kids.
Today, choose to see yourself through the lens of this wisdom. Every single thing that you might see as a flaw is actually a unique part of your story.
My c-section scar tells me that I put the life of my son before anything else.
The grey hair represents the 31 years of experiences that have made me the woman that I am today.
Ponder on these words daily
“You are beautiful from head to toe, my dear love, beautiful beyond compare, absolutely flawless” Songs of Solomon 4:7 The Message
Go ahead and write them on post-it notes and stick them on every mirror. These words are true and never changing. These Heavenly standards of beauty can never shift or change.
Next time you try on a swimming suit, picture Jesus saying this to you and dropping the mic.
You are a masterpiece.
This world keeps trying to fill up our minds with self-destructive lies. Let’s impart grace to ourselves and abide in the truth that tells us that we are fearfully and wonderfully made!
Let’s talk again soon…